=D Tuesday, 25 December 2007 =) 1:49 am
how bad can ur xmas eve be?
would it be worse then mine?? eating ur dinner like a Bangladeshis on the roof top of vivocity... waiting for a bunch of late-comers n noisy movie watchers... wad's worse? thinking about things tt wont happen at all... wad a day-dreaming guy i'm... why cant i forget it at all?? since it's impossible to happen y am i still thinking about it?? this cut really hurts... some may say "it's only a girl... y take it so hard?" but wad do thy know about it? wad did thy place in this hope-table?
such heavy gamble i did n in the end i lost... lost heavily... y did i in the 1st place wanna play this game? knowing tt i might not win at all... but i still play.. y? y am i so stupid??
going out with friends u r suppose to be happy... but sad enough... i cant seems to last my smile for more thn 15mins... or even 5 i should say... patience ran out... cant even wait for 1 min.. slightest noise made i find it noisy n irritating... now whn my phone rings or msg arrived i find it irritating... but i was actually waiting for her message... y am i waiting? i've no idea y... scanning my msn list wondering if she would be online or not... hoping tt there might be 1 more chance.. 1 more chance for me again... am i stupid or am i stupid?
every night i lie on my bed... trying my best to cry thinking that it might actually help me... but i fail... tears just dun wish to come out... my heart cram in tightly as if high pressure is being place on it... i've no rights to even think about it i guess.. who am i after all... i'm just a nobody... not even her closest friend i guess... just a stranger tt have let her know i like her...
never in my life have i felt like this... I would actually say this 3 words to u if i could... but i guess it wont help at all... "I NEED YOU!! I REALLY DO!!" y just wont u give me a chance to show it? y wont u? y? u mean for the past few weeks i've been dreaming?? now i'm suffering from the nightmare?? WHY!! WHY?!?! I DUN GET IT!! WHY!!!!!!!
Everyday is Sunny.
