=D Sunday, 1 February 2009 =) 11:32 pm
for 1 moment i'm excited n hyper over it... next i'm super sian n has no mood in doing anything at all already... said things tt i werent meant to say... but things r done n cant be undone...
for days i cant slp at all... took me more then 2hrs to get into slp n my memory is getting worse n worse... totally dun have study mood to kick start my revision.. issit because of 'it'?
'it' has blind my path way n has totally smoke me out for the past few days... could it be just because of 1 simple 'it' n it totally ruin me? is my life really ruin by 'it'??
time pass n plans started to fade away... dreams shattered... health getting worse... doing things without motivation at all... if ask... "wad happen?" i would just smile n act as if nth has happen... but inside my heart i wish to blast it all out... only if it hasnt been this way... y did i ever choose this path? issit fate? issit my destiny?
isnt it colourful at all whn u have nth at all... no worries, no stress, no pressures, just like a baby or children between the age of 3-5... every morning waking up just eat, play, slp... making friends by sharing toys... running about without much to care about... if only time could be turn back... i would rather stay as a children n never grow up.. ironically, whn we r young, we wanna grow up fast... we wanna be adult.. watch NC-16, M-18, R-21.. drink alcoholic drinks, smoke, do things tt arent suppose to be done under age... wad a funny world it is...
Who would believe other then my closest friend(s) [if any] that I actually have a hard time handling relationship... Eye candies, Crushes, Likes, Loves, Adore, Admire, Puppy love... u name it... why?? either I dun have a common topic to talk, or i'm too tounge tied... either i asked too fast, or get them to be my friend only(abit hard to phrase u get wad i mean..)
One of my friend ever told me, "your destiny isnt here yet, once it's here she will be the one for you." letting fate taking control of my life? issit wad i wan? Can u stop some1 from loving u or stop loving some1 u loved b4?
Kenny oh Kenny... u used to be a problem solver, relac only life, dun care much about wad has happen or not, have friends to play with or share things with... now... u r just a bum... coward, aim-less, sickload, worse then sotong fellow... could u at least pull ur socks higher? move abit faster, have a proper life??
Everyday is Sunny.
